How childhood trauma affecting relationships? Trauma forces us into survival mode, a suspended state of animation that monopolizes and uses up all our energy. When you’re in survival mode it’s hard — if not impossible — to get close to people. Experiencing trauma before the age of 10 makes you prone to isolating yourself and cutting of the relationships that give you the love you so desperately need. Nothing melts shame faster than allowing the full weight of your heart to be seen by another person.You can counteract this behavioral coping mechanism by allowing yourself to be vulnerable and loving with others. Find a small handful of friends (or a lover) and double down on your connection with them.
Ludus is a child-like and flirtatious love commonly found in the beginning stages of a relationship (a.k.a. the honeymoon stage). This type of love consists of teasing, playful motives and laughter between two people. Although common in young couples, older couples who strive for this love find a more rewarding relationship. Your emotions allow you to feel giddy, excited, interested and involved with another person. Mania is an obsessive love towards a partner. It leads to unwanted jealousy or possessiveness — known as codependency. Most cases of obsessive love are found in couples with an imbalance of love towards each other. An imbalance of Eros and Ludus is the main cause of Mania. With healthy levels of playful and romantic love, the harm of obsessive love can be avoided.
Set boundaries for your child. Setting rules—and consistently following through with consequences if they are broken—is an important aspect of building trust between you and your child. Talk to your child about the reasons behind rules so they know why rules exist and what you consider proper behavior. Your child might test those limits, but if you are consistent with logical consequences, and remind them about the reasons behind the rule, they might think twice about breaking that rule the next time.
According to psychologists, there are five types of love styles. First, the pleaser, who often grows up in a household with an overly protective or angry and critical parent. Second, the victim, who often grows up in a chaotic home with angry or violent parents and tries to be compliant in order to fly under the radar. Third, the controller, who grows up in a home where there wasn’t a lot of protection so s/he has learned to toughen up and take care of themselves. Fourth, the vacillator, who grows up with an unpredictable parent and develop a fear of abandonment. And fifth, the avoider, who grows up in a less affectionate home that values independence and self-sufficiency. Find extra information on click here for childhood memories affecting relationship.
If you find that self-care is assisting with your mental health but you still need more assistance, you may want to seek professional help. Therapists can help with breaking down the emotions associated with childhood trauma. There are many therapeutic approaches to addressing childhood trauma. They provide a safe space for you to share your experiences so you may continue healing. As impressionable children we are greatly affected by our surroundings. When it comes to trauma, the emotional and physical effects can last a lifetime. By seeking professional help, addressing the traumatic incident, and learning new behaviours, one can begin to heal and learn the signs of unhealthy relationships. Understanding and acknowledging the impact of the trauma on the relationship is the first step to healing.